IMHO, and this is really just my personal opinion, the only way to learn how to build a big system is to build one and learn the extent of your ignorance by failing at it the first few times out.
I started a decade ago on my first job on a 20.000 line web app developed with two other guys. Over time that became a 700.000 line system developed by several dozens of people and on track to be a million lines in two years. Between then and now I've learned that I'm very ignorant. I still feel like I'm trying to figure this stuff out and not quite succeeding. :)
As a good second-best choice, try contributing to a large open source project. No books will teach you this stuff, you have to do it to learn it.
I started a decade ago on my first job on a 20.000 line web app developed with two other guys. Over time that became a 700.000 line system developed by several dozens of people and on track to be a million lines in two years. Between then and now I've learned that I'm very ignorant. I still feel like I'm trying to figure this stuff out and not quite succeeding. :)
As a good second-best choice, try contributing to a large open source project. No books will teach you this stuff, you have to do it to learn it.